Bling 6: May Status Report


TO:        J.B. CALHOUN

FR:        P. BLING



Item 1: Phone Call

Is that you calling on my cell phone right now? If so, please understand that I can’t pick up as I’m waiting for important further marching instructions from GlobaCorp (see below).

Item 2:     GlobaCorp a Go
Success! I have indeed received the positive feedback [link to thank you note] we’ve been waiting for from GlobaCorp on our February proposal (not to mention an obvious nod to our CAT system). Apparently, it was misdirected to another Phns Blng somewhere in my greater Metropolitan area and arrived to me two months after its postmark. Though it is not a signed agreement, per se’, it is certainly enough assurance for us to begin purchasing inventory and delivering on our proposed program (the misdirection has already put us behind schedule).

Little wonder that GlobaCorp still has not technically fully committed to the program we outlined in our proposal. You always advise us to “swing for the fences”, and in doing so this plan simply represents too big a sea change for your average Fortune 500 company to readily digest. I expect they’ll need to mull it awhile, perhaps hire various consulting firms to implement organizational changes to accommodate the massive overhaul it represents. A deal of this size is nothing to be taken lightly. Again, though, I see no reason for us not to mobilize and begin work in earnest.

Item 3: New Product Development

With this item, I formally launch an endeavor I will refer to only as Project “Gemini”. This unsecured medium is not suited to disclosure of further details. For now, all I will state is that it is a departure from my normal job responsibilities (which do not include product development) and it primarily involves pants (although GargantiCo is not currently in the garment industry). Beyond that, I will simply ask you a question: have you ever looked at your pants hanging there in the closet, or draped lifelessly across your lap, and thought “is that all they DO?”  More later.

Item 4: Corporate Message Correction
Although only submitted last month, I have already decided to change the corporate positioning for May. “Focus is our focus” is strong and owes much to our storied heritage and the words of our founder, Dr. Schell Greene. However, a chance snippet overheard in a bathroom stall at the Denver airport spurs me to re-think the May messaging. Apparently, the masses are roiling over the issue of corporate accounting practices. So, to head off any feelings of ill-will toward our fine company, during May we will be espousing “Trust Us: What Have You Got To Lose?”. Will send the memo globally pending the appropriate signatures.

Jen’s back on my cell phone staff and more reliable than ever (broke fibula in the Adirondacks). My Blackberry’s an option, as long as we don’t port to the CAT system mid-month.
Handwritten Thank You Note (linked from text above)

GlbCrp Lvs Phns Blng! Jst LVS Blng 2 dth!

– Jss Kllnt + GlbCrp

~ by joshuakelly on May 31, 2007.

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